February 16, 2003

NAMALA(MA)-Ding-Dong!

I was looking at my weblogs the other day and stumbled across some gems. Apparently searching for 'paparazzi naked photos' hit my brother's site, but he was only 46th. Come on, Paul. If you want to be ranked higher in the 'paparazzi naked photos' search results you're going to have to mention 'paparazzi naked photos' alot more. You'll get even better ranking if you name some random links 'paparazzi naked photos'. Also, get other people to link to your website with 'paparazzi naked photos' as the link text, that'll boost your ranking for sure!

God only knows why, but apparently we showed up in a search for "Alligator Meat for Sale". For all you Alligator Lovers (I wonder if anyone will ever search for that? Members of The North American Man-Alligator Love Association maybe) let me say I've never killed a gator nor made gator flesh available for purchase. I have however eaten Alligator meat before, and if I had some "Alligator Meat for Sale" I'd probably charge quite a lot for it because it was pretty good.

If you check out my resume you'll notice I worked in the search engine business for a little while. I have a cute story I'll share with you from that experience. One of the programmers was working on a program to automatically classify and group hundreds of thousands of messages. As a test they fed it the alt.sex newsgroups to see what it could make of them. The program would spit out a list of the most important words that distinguished posts in the alt.sex news groups. The first two words were standard naughty words, but the third word on the list seems to sum up 99% of the posts: "Moron". I swear this is true.

Posted by thom at February 16, 2003 05:56 PM
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